Day 3- put on a shirt, football, and productivity
Today’s blog…..fat chicks at the gym, football, and not being a degenerate drunk on a Sunday…Enjoy.
So let me make a few observations now that I’m going to the gym with the rest of the New Year’s Resolution people.
1. Ladies, I appreciate that you are in the gym. You are trying to get back in shape. You want to fit into that dress from senior year of college. I get that. It’s cool. But can we just settle on one thing. Until you have lost those…15, 20, maybe 40 pounds, how about you put a shirt on over that sports bra. Until you have a flat stomach or at the very least no rolls..just throw on a t-shirt. I mean it has got to be embarrassing for you. Is it motivation? Everyone looking at you in disgust? Cause really, if that’s the case just get a personal trainer. They get paid to motivate you.
2. Old ladies are crazy. There was an old lady who went up to the counter as I was walking into the gym and she says to the guy at the front desk, “sir, there are men getting hard ons on the vibrating machines” Here is the problem. The gym does not have any machines that vibrate other than treadmills and stair climbers.
3. Dude…stop grunting. Maybe you should ease into your workout routine. Give it a week or two before you give yourself a heart attack.
4. I’m dreading going to the gym tomorrow.
My football thoughts for this Sunday:
Giants – You have got to be kidding me
Pats – Good luck in the playoffs. It will be needed unless Julian Edelman (or as I call him “mini Wes Welker) has 11 catches a game
Eagles – I love it when Philly teams lay down and tear their fans hearts out
Jets – Making it look way too easy
Bengals – Guess you don’t like the cold Carson Palmer
Broncos – Josh McDanials must have a lump in his stomach. How embarrassing.
So I watched the Pats game at the Stumble Inn….the bartenders sort of laughed at the fact that I was not drinking. It was fine and I made it to the gym afterwards, unheard of for me. I got back to my apartment…cooked for the week, cleaned my kitchen, stared at the pile of clothes in front of my closet, ate, watching the Jet game, writing this blog, continuing to stare at said pile of clothes on the floor, you know productive things.
I hope your week at work is not as bad as I am quite sure mine will be.