Morning running sucks and Very large illegal knives

by agoodnow

Running in the morning is awful.  I take back everything I wrote about morning running from yesterday morning’s post.  How in the hell is someone supposed to function at peak levels immediately after getting out of bed? Your body is dehydrated, under nourished, and groggy.  Your heart rate is low.  Body is cold.  It is like you just stopped being dead for 6 hours.   I’ve never been dead, but I will assume that you don’t run very well after that experience.   Do you know when most heart attacks occur?  Monday MORNINGS!!!!!  

I don’t care about the extra energy I have throughout the day after my morning run.  God made coffee for a reason:  so that I don’t have to excercise until the afternoon. 

Today’s Run:

I made it a half mile before I realized that I was no longer running, rather I was hobbling like an 86-year-old man.   I kept going, made it 4 miles or so with a few breaks to stretch.   At one point I realized that just about everyone in the park looked like they were running 20 mph.  I got passed by what could legitimately be called a “little person”.   The embarrassment alone is reason enough to never run in the morning ever again.  A woman with walking poles was nearly keeping up with me. 

I will say that the park is pleasant in the mornings – I like the quiet.  I ran the reservoir which has a very clean smell.  There were some ducks hanging out in the reservoir.   I almost felt like I was in nature.  Almost.

Here is my end statement about morning running:  Most races are held between 7-10 am.  So I guess I will have to stop bitching and get used to the morning run. 

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On my run home from the park, I’m running across Park Ave. when I see a 5 inch switch blade in the middle of the street.   I picked it up and everyone near me just stopped.  The blade was open so I put it in between my thumb and forefinger.  A van was trying to turn the corner as I walked back toward the sidewalk and the driver was about to beep his horn when he saw the large knife in my hand.   He didn’t beep his horn.   I threw the knife in a garbage can on the street corner.  I will consider that my good deed of the day.  Glad it did not get in the hands of the kid who had the spray paint last night.  (see ‘2.3 pounds of salad and spray paint’ post)

I sent a text to my buddy who is an NYC cop and asked him how illegal it is for someone to be carrying that knife on them.  His response, “You would be playing Varitek’s (a catcher for the Boston Red Sox) position in an 8×8 cell if you got caught with it.”   Aren’t I glad that I threw that in the garbage. 

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Read the funniest article this morning.  I was laughing to myself on the subway platform so loud that the people on either side of me peaked over and started reading along with me.

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/2010/03/15/100315sh_shouts_brenner

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Quote of the day:

“There is no point at which you can say, ‘Well, I’m successful now. I might as well take a nap.'”