1 large rented van
3 hotel rooms
2 border crossings
1 new nickname that will NEVER go away
And one pit boss who fell in love…………
I drove a total of 412 hours in our trip due to a few things:
1. I rented the van and was the only one on the insurance
2. I would not trust my life and the lives of some of my best friend’s in the hands of some of the maniacs who went on this trip
3. See number (2) and repeat it over and over again. I made several promises about everyone living and not being detained in Canada. I can just see some of the mother’s and wives of my friends sitting up all night……….. staring at the ceiling……………..holding roserie beads.
4. We hit two traffic jams and I was at the wheel of this van for over 12 hours. Painful.
Bachelor parties are fundamentally dumb.
If any man ever says, “I’d like some Soft Serve” he is begging to be made fun of (without reservation) for the remainder of his life.
Kilkenny is a great beer, but not as good as I remembered.
Never get into an “arguementation” with a guy who installs your car stereo. Yes, that word was spoken. And yes, everyone in the van was laughing. And yes, the person who said it had no idea what was going on. And yes, I almost drove the van off the side of the road due to how funny made up words can be.
Canadians do not like Americans.
Canadian bouncers are very mean.
I won money
I lost money
I won more money
I went on a heater at 5 am
I left with money
I spent too much money
If I never drive a 12 passenger van again I will die a happy man
The pit boss at the casino fell in love with the bachelor. To the point where it got creepy. I thought he was going to ask for an invite to the wedding.
I got a free t-shirt. It is awesome. Ok, it is not awesome. I did not realize that on the back of it there is a skull and cross bones. I’m glad my friends let me walk around with that……………..
I ate McDonald’s for the first time in a year. I ordered the Walnut and fruit salad with a medium fry. I am the picture of good health.
Everyone survived. All men accounted for. I’m never going to Montreal again.
Oh, one funny story to end.
On the way home the bachelor asks, “Who do you think will be the next to get married?”
The answer came from a buddy of mine. (I will list people’s initials and then my name)
“First it will be SR”
He pauses to think………….
“Then Goodnow again…………”
It’s funny because it’s true.