My 5 Year Old Sister

by agoodnow

I have a 5 year old sister.  Today she did not have school.  We spent a good portion of the day together.  A few notes on my day with a 5 year old.  

1. NO, you cannot have another chocolate milkshake!

2. Ten minutes into our walk she wanted to go home.  She whined.  I told her no, we were going to keep walking.  Three hours later I couldn’t get her to go home.

3. We had a footrace.  I will point out that I am training for a marathon and she ummm….she is really fast for a five year old.  I was shocked that I had to kick it up a notch to make sure I kept it respectable.  She was also…wearing…boots.  I was wearing running shoes.  Let’s move on. 

4. We saw a swan in the ocean.  I found this unique.  She couldn’t care less………UNTIL…..the swan swam away and she suddenly really wanted to see the swan.  Luckily it came back and she got to say good-bye to it.  Thank you Mr. Swan.  That saved a headache.

5. She picked up everything she could get her hands on – 

Put that feather down it is dirty

Put that stick down it has thorns.

Put the board down it has nails.

Don’t touch the glass.

This could go on and on….

6. I taught her how to read the sign that reads:  PRIVATE PROPERTY – NO TRESPASSING.   I feel that will be a decent life lesson. 

7. She asked me if my Dad was dead.  (We different Dads).  First I picked my jaw off the ground and then I explained to her that my Dad was alive and well.  I tried to skate over this one as not to confuse her TOO much.  “Yeah, he’s alive.  Don’t worry about it.  Look there is a board with nails in it for you to play with.”

8. A little boy ran up to her with a toy gun and shot her in the face with it.  I look at her and ask, “Do you know him.”  She responds, “Yeah, that’s Brody.  He’s my boyfriend, we are getting married.”  

Don’t think that’s a good idea.  Hopefully she loses the thing for boys with guns before college. 

9. We got back to the house and we played baseball.  She was hitting bombs.  I am scared at how hard a 5 year old girl can hit the ball.  The first time she hit the ball it whizzed by me and I didn’t know what was happening.  How did a 37 pound child just do that?  

10. She littered.  I told her that the police investigate littering and people DO go to jail.  Just so she knows….